Hey-O Captain Jack, bring me back to the railroad track

[kaitou]

I am a huge fan of Pirates of the Carribean. I have extremely fond memories of the first movie where it inexplicably made me happy when i was depressed, and I stayed happy ever after that. And I loved the second movie...Gerbil Wheel! Davy Jones! Jars of Dirt! But I can't say that I loved this third one so unreservedly.

They could have cut Tia Whatzername as Calypso and Sao Feng altogether...neither of those plot twists went anywhere at all. It would have been better to give our East India Tea Company guy a little more character in place of either of the other two. It was like an overstuffed sofa that ends up being a bit lumpy instead of wonderfully comfy. Also...is it just me or did the stick a bunch of Chinese people on the swamp set from movie 2 and call it Singapore?

That being said...Elizabeth the Pirate King! LOVE! She kicks such ass. And I loved that she and Will didn't work out ANY of their issues, but apparently seeing her being kick-ass pirate queen was hot enough for Will to propose again on the spot. Peanut! Monkey out of a canon!

I even liked the ending. Will is the kind of honest and hardworking guy that is ideally suited to guiding the dead. Jack would have been distracted by the first shiny thing...even reflections off the water...and turned immediately into a starfish. And Elizabeth will make an awesome Pirate Queen. I read on some other people's journals that it's supposed to be a 'happy ending' and that Will only actually has to do that for 10 years and then he's free to go on and lead a normal life. I find this highly unsatisfying. Especially considering that it isn't explained like that at all in the movie.

In this case I imagine that a continuation of the epilogue would go something like this...

Elizabeth: Meet your son, William Turner the XVIII! I wasn't sure how many Will Turner's there've been, so I decided on eighteen.
Will: Hurray! And now we can all live together and be a normal family.
Elizabeth: Wait, what?
Will: The curse is broken! I'm an ordinary person again.
Eilzabeth: ...what?
Will: After 10 years of service I'm a free man again, because you were there to meet me.
Elizabeth: No one mentioned anything like that!
Will: You shout like it's a bad thing.
Elizabeth: Well, you see, it's just that I thought you were immortal now. You know, ten years at see one night on land for eternity.
Will: And....
Elizabeth: Well, I wasn't getting any younger you know. And I wasn't going to sit back and let you be the only pretty one.
Will: .....what did you do?
Elizabeth: well, you see...Jack had a map to the fountain of youth and...well, I've kind of ended up immortal.
Will: (deep breath, count to ten) I suppose we'll just have to go back there then.
Elizabeth: Can't. Jack broke it. Before he could get any water too...it was very tragic. Well, sort of tragic. Actually, not at all tragic when I really think about it.