Translation is a Fine Art

[kaitou]

In a meeting with my department:

Boss: //We need to find out why they aren't using the check fixture.//
Me: We need to find out why they aren't using the check fixture.
Boss: //One reason is that it does hurt to use it all day.//
Me: One reason is that it does hurt to use it all day.
Boss: //I know if I used it it all day, I wouldn't be able to use my precious right hand.//
Me: He knows that if he used it all day, he wouldn't be....//I'm not translating that!//
Boss: //But, that's the hand I drink beer with!//
Me: //Well, that's not what it sounds like you're doing!//
Coworker: Did he say beer?